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From digest.v7.n453 Thu Oct 16 20:12:14 1997
From: "Barber,Ray E" <>
Date: Thu, 16 Oct 1997 11:38:23 -0700
Subject: I had a dream last night...

Excerpts of conversations I overheard while floating disembodied over PizzaFest '98:

Deranged Collie: (little flecks of spittle and Rolling Rock at the corners of his mouth) I'd just gotten 3M to make these pre-cut adhesive outfits for all 8 HOOTER girls, in ///M colors, no less! As I was about the apply the "RM3DR1" sticker...

MPothole: ...and, just when I got them all to respect me again, along comes this guy, sucking up, telling me how great my droplight stories are...and he spells my name wrong! Well, my reputation was in peril - BAM, I had to slam him...

Pat Donutview: ...this guy had actually figured a way to drop the trannie of his 3.0 through the sunroof of the Lexus and work on it from his leather seats, using the GPS to keep the 3.0 perfectly aligned and balanced over the 91" stack of cinder blocks...

Snatched CurlTounge: ...yeah, so there I was in my 300, no, 400, horsepower front wheel drive turbo Saab, traveling at 135 kph over black ice in blinding rain with no wipers on the StrudelStrasse outside of Meisterbrau, Germany. I looked at her, and, just for a minute, I saw the both of us on some kind of tropical island someplace, walking down a white sandy beach, eating something. And she looks at me and says, "Bad dog!", as she often called my little companion. And I thought, 'Bad dog, bad dog...BAD DOG!'...

Lena, '02 Warrior Princess: I says, "Don't you say 'Yes, Ma'am' to ME." And I made him pray to MY god...

Jim Contorti: ...I actually figured a way to get these 275/40ZR-17's in the wheel wells of an '84 318i, remotely adjust the wheel camber using the stock AM/FM cassette, create stump pulling torque at idle, and still get 34 mpg. And it's all right here on this little chip. Send me $100 by the end of the month and I'll send you one. After that, you can only get them through AMWAY distributors...

While all you 3'ers are jinking and you 5'ers are wheezing during your autocross, you'll hear a great sucking sound and have to chase after your RM3DR1 bumper stickers and 3M stick-on paint protectors as they are pulled along in the vacuum in front of you. And, maybe, just maybe, when you all get together after the last cone has been knocked over and the HOOTER girls are wiped from your laps, you'll compare stories and piece together the one thing all of you remember seeing: bcgGOTW (big_coupe_group: GET OUT THE WAY).

The Big Coupes are invited, right?

6'er, chuckling to himself after the autocross, "Just like a 3 and a 5 to bring a knife to a gun fight."

Ray Barber
'88 M6 (should be ready for a cross country trek by then. And I can honestly say there won't be any place I won't go for good pizza ;-) ) '91 R100GS (left me for another man)

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